The Wand Position

The Wand Position
Often Used for Magic

Monday, July 31, 2006

An Uncomfortable Truth?

It is in the nature of our world to shield our friends and loved ones from danger yes - but sometimes we shield them from the truth especially if that truth could be a hurtful one or at least we believe they may feel that.

It is awkward isn't it - we want to protect them from this pain and we think - perhaps we even feel that they have it but they are too polite to say so - meaning they know the truth but they don't want to bring it up, they don't want to feel it, they don't want to see it, they don't want to know about it. What can we do in such circumstances.

Is it possible to rescue them somehow? Is it even desirable? It is most difficult but sometimes a truth has to be said even if the feelings may be hurt - even if there is even some awkwardness for us or we may be misunderstood by others. Sometimes it has to be said.

There are moments when we can say them. It is possible yes, to be polite. It is possible even to be discrete but sometimes when we are polite or even overly discrete - when we speak our truth it is not understood because in order for the truth to be known it is often necessary to be clear.

Therefore when such clarity is spoken in print or otherwise - very often in the spoken word - it can cause harm yes, embarrassment often but after this truth sinks in it can often cause change.

Sometimes the change becomes a disguise but other times the change is actually quite noticeable and something gets done about it in yes - a benevolent way.

In the famous story where the child says - but the emperor's not wearing any clothes - you all know that one - change happens. After a few moments of embarrassment the emperor realizes what the real situation is and then we move on. That famous story is important because it reveals what must be revealed and it does so in an amusing and yes, entertaining way.

So my feeling is this in this short post today - consider when your friends tell you something even if it is embarrassing - is there truth in it. If there is truth does the truth hurt more then the realization of the fact - or is it even a fact? Is it strictly opinion.

Sometimes the truth does masquerade as opinion but other times opinion can appear to be something else.

How often children speak the truth. Sometimes it is welcome, sometimes it is amusing and other times it is just embarrassing.

I'm bringing this up today because I have been accused from time to time of speaking the truth - and when I was younger the idea of speaking the truth was not something to be embarrassed about, it was considered to be a good quality.

There have been others who have spoken the truth and my feeling is that this can be a good thing but the truth must be tempered with kindness and love otherwise it is not truth even though it might be absolutely obvious.

We must find a balance so that our truth is understood, so that others can hear it and see it clearly, so that the value of what we speak is less in its shock or entertainment - as one often sees in the entertainment industry - but rather the value is in the outcome.

Lets consider - whatever truth that people say to us or to the world that we hear about - that it can have value if we can look around and see that there are aspects of truth to it. We don't have to jump up and say - oh my gosh - or we don't have to admit to anything publicly but we can look at it and say - this has value, I'll consider it.

I know this all sounds like policy, what I'm saying - but my feeling is that there are times coming when we will all hear truth spoken in the most innocent of ways and very often as it says in the bible it will come from a child or as I feel the bible really means - in the manner of a child - and when that happens sometimes we don't know how to take it.

Can the truth really set us free - perhaps it can. Lets be open to hearing it and lets consider whether it has value.

I strongly believe in the value of benevolence and I believe that the truth can be benevolent if spoken in a kind and loving way. I have learned a little about that in life and I hope that everyone else embraces it too. I have heard that many people do and I think perhaps it is so. I believe we will find truth - it will come to us and we will know it when we feel it.

Goodlife to you all and goodnight.


Seven said...

This post has made my head very busy; hopefully in a constructive manner...:-)
I don't know if you intended to, but I think you flirted around the edges of the political correctness demon here. I've often thought 'political correctness' is misnamed and every bit as detrimental to our culture as it is beneficial. I would really enjoy seeing the expansion of your thoughts around that specific issue in our culture.
On a side note, I have a niece that is very straightforward. I have always enjoyed being around here for that reason. She isn't vicious or mean in pronouncements, but rather almost child-like as you talk about. I find her refreshing.

Ilias- said...

This is a beautifully written and inspiring post. I've been trying out ways of being geniune in my life which includes the truth that I feel and sharing (or not) that truth depending upon both my feelings and the need or lack of need of others. Sounds like discernment which is different from avoidance. Sometimes I do both, and sometimes truth hurts (me or others), so I appreciate this discussion and how positive change can evolve out of the truth we feel and share. For me, it helps to trust that the best (and most benevolent) outcome will prevail, and to realize truth is not always logical but heartfelt.
Thanks for the post.

Robert Shapiro said...

Seven, I appreciate your comment.

I'm not sure whether I was intending to include political correctness if political correctness has to do with kindness and consideration but if you're talking about classification of people as a means of avoiding the fact that they are people and they have hearts and feelings just like everyone - then yes - maybe.

Thanks again for your insightful comments and for your attention to detail.

Goodlife my friend.

Robert Shapiro said...

Steve, thank you for your comment and your detailed explanation of your view of this discussion I've been having in this post.

I agree with you in that I feel it does require considerable sensitivity to know when or when not to comment but I have always found that utilizing my own feelings is the best benchmark to know when or when not.

Granted it may not always reflect the other person's feelings but it's what I have when I'm not sure what they're feeling. Sometimes I have a sense of what they're feeling but I'm not always right :-)

Goodlife my friend.

Ilias- said...