The Wand Position

The Wand Position
Often Used for Magic

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

More On Letting Go

I know many of you are going through very difficult times right now. It seems to be happening all over the world. I want to remind you that there are opportunities - good things can happen but something that works for me is what I would recommend for you as well. I know I've mentioned this before but it's important to have a reminder now and then isn't it. Remember to let go.

Just take a breath and lean back in a chair and release that breath and just totally relax for a moment.

Try to do this with the phone ringer off and without any worry about anyone demanding your attention in that moment - it'll take less than a minute. Just take a deep breath, just one - not too deep just deep enough and let it out in a natural way - don't blow it out and while you're letting it out just completely let go of your body and relax. You can do this when you're lying down if you prefer.

If you want to add something to it with words you can right after you release that breath. Just say, "I give up." I know it's hard sometimes to say that because we're trained to do everything but give up but I've been guided and I believe on the basis of my experience that the physical feeling of giving up is the exact same feeling of letting go and for those of you who find the idea of letting go to be vague - I'll bet you've had to give up at one time or another with something.

If you haven't then just do the breath and the relaxation but if you have given up before you know that it's the same.

It creates a release and you let go of all attachments in thought and in feeling in that moment.

Try it at least once a week and then just forget about it afterwards. Don't think about it, don't expect anything one way or the other but it can lead to good things down the road in time.



Alison Jane Lysakowski said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Alison Jane Lysakowski said...

i sometimes find myself in a bottomless pit. i dont want to let go of feelings until ive made them apparent to whoever made me feel bad, but too often, it would only make things worse for me to be open about it, so i keep it all inside. its for the better every time i hold back, but it hurts so bad and i dont know if im even mature enough yet to totally relax and let go of whats bothering me right now.

anyway, i dont like giving up on making my friends see what theyve done to hurt me.
everything else, i can let go.

my question for you is,
what can i do when my friends hurt me and all they do is cover it up by acting like i'm hurting them by telling them about it??
it's hard for me to let go when they simply refuse to be aware.
these are true friends that im very close to, that honestly just do not see at all that they hurt me all the time. even when i passively let them know. its almost like they dont even hear what im saying. like they tune it out so they dont have to feel bad themselves.

Robert Shapiro said...

Greetings Alison. Not too long ago I had someone that I worked with who does not really understand from this persons life my life experience and they would from time to time say things that hurt my feelings.

I found that I wanted to give them gentle hints, which I think that you can relate to, that they were hurting my feelings but they didn't get it or they did not respond in a way that caused me to believe they got it because they would continue to make those remarks or send me things that they thought were funny on the computer that actually hurt my feelings.

Finally I discovered that I had to come right out and say it to them, make it crystal clear. I did that and much to my amazement this person thanked me and actually said to me that they didn't like the way I talked to them in the past because it wasn't clear. They accused me of talking around something and not coming to the point.

Sometimes, I found out with this person, it's better to speak bluntly even though I didn't like to do that. Since I don't like to speak bluntly and harshly to people I decided that this is not going to be someone that's going to be a friend of mine though they are someone that I have to work with sometimes.

So - that's that then. It's good to know who our true friends are even though, according to my experience, people can sometimes be a true friend they also sometimes want things from me that I don't want to give them because that's not a part of my personality.

So I spoke bluntly to that person because I had to work with that person sometimes but that doesn't mean I want to be their therapist if you know what I mean. This is what I hear you saying. You like the people because you think of them as friends but you don't want to be their therapist. Seems to me that's what I hear from you.